another sorta vent on the 4th of july, i cant wait to eat some burgers later lol but for now i gotta let this shit out.

a few days ago my 2nd ex and i had an argument. a pretty big argument may i say. I broke up with this guy pretty much a year ago. and i broke up with him on a very bad time. I'm not going to say what happened but i really put salt in the wound in this guy and i feel fucking awful about it. that was a year ago, I've told him I'm sorry pretty much a thousand times since then, and he said that it was fine and he forgave me... until he decided to bring it up randomly out of nowhere again recently. and we had a pretty big argument through text. And he claims that I'm the one in the wrong. I've said sorry to this guy a thousand times, and this guy forgave me a thousand times, i don't see the problem here. i said that he was butt hurt and i started to mildly insult him, not proud of it but i was pretty pissed. and then he started taking some pretty big jabs at me, saying and i quote

"i wish you luck later in life cause your going off on me but I'm the one whose most likely to be successful while your sitting here playing the same ole games with the same fucking knuckle head you decided to meet online. get your life together asshole."

this pissed me off for a couple of reasons. first of all, the "fucking knucklehead" he was talking about, he was referring to my best friend who i will keep anonymous, unless you know me then you probably already know. DO NOT BRING MY MOTHER FUCKER INTO THIS CONVERSATION. HE HAS NOTHING TO DO WITH THIS BULLSHIT AND THE FACT YOUR ROPING HIM INTO THIS BULLSHIT AGRUMENT SHOWS THAT YOUR A WEAK LITTLE PUSSY.

second off, he said he was "going to be the most likely successful" and I'm just going to be a loser. may i add that he and my friend and i all created our own animated shows, and my ex tried making an object show, that took him over pretty much 2 years to make like 2 episodes. and i don't mean to be an asshole at all, but they do not look good at all, it looks like he used Microsoft paint to make everything, crude drawings with terrible voice acting with a crappy mic with the most boring unfunny dialogue ever. me and my friend have constantly tried to help him pretty much since he the day started his project 2 years ago. we've offered voice acting, background artists, writers, and even animators. but he denied all of it, and his project looks like complete utter garbage. you may be wondering "well what if bro wants to make his show all alone? maybe it would have looked really great if he worked at it!" we thought that too. but every time he showed us sneak peeks of his episode, it was the same boring crap. this happened in the course of 2 years and a half. and every time we said that it needs improvement he said the usual "I'm just gonna cancel this project, fuck you guys". and ghosts us for like a week or more.

like in the words of some youtubers i watch: "if you create art and cannot accept criticism then maybe you shouldn't create art".

I'm not gonna lie, I'm a total loser, but when someone talks about my work and offers me new opportunities and help and ways to improve, i would take it. i listen to criticism, i encourage it, i take that criticism to heart and i use it to improve.

so tell me. who's more likely to be successful in life? a guy who cant take criticism and gets super pissy all the time, or a guy who takes criticism and embraces it help him grow? I'm gonna let that up to you because i don't exactly wanna toot my own horn.

and the third and final point. the "get your life together" part. the past year I've been trying to improve myself as a person, specifically quitting porn and more recently, writing a journal, and every day im trying to discover new ways to help myself and the people around me. and my relationships with my friends and family and the way i treat people as a whole i feel like has definitely changed. i feel less angry, less irritable and more happy overall. if you ask me i feel like my life is more than together right now, I'm at my peak. I'm not too sure about his life, but he don't fucking know me at all. so the fact that he says that i need to "get my life together", just fucking stupid, he don't know me at all anymore, you don't have the right to tell me to get my life together when we haven't had a full conversation since last Christmas.

and you know the cherry on top of this shit sundae is? he snapped and started being a dick, because i joined a fucking fortnite game he was in for a few minutes, and then left. i thought my friend was playing with him but apparently he wasnt. and he got all pissed because i left the game he was in. i didnt even just upright leave, i told him and everyone he was playing with "eh i might as well go, goodbye". and then he started being all pissy, and starting dming me dumabass shit like "this concudes our chapter, you can block me btw.". the most stupid shit ive ever heard. you couldn't even tell me that that hurt your feelings? maybe you could have told me and i could have joined back and we could have played, and had a blast. but no he got all butt hurt and started talking about shit that at that point i moved on from. so if your reading this, you know who you are. move the fuck on, how about you take notes on what you said to me and get your shit together.

thanks for reading.